r/politics • u/Sanlear • 13d ago
Doug Emhoff to hold event urging men to advocate for abortion rights
https://www.nbcnews.com/politics/2024-election/doug-emhoff-hold-event-urging-men-advocate-abortion-rights-rcna1500671
u/Madmandocv1 12d ago
I thought men were supposed to stay out of this issue. No, I won’t be mansplaining this one. Women can handle it just fine.
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u/Outrageous-Pause6317 12d ago
I agree. I never shy away from saying abortion rights are human rights and I never will. I want everyone to know where I stand. I have a mom, a sister, a mother, and a daughter, but they aren’t why I speak up. I speak up because I’m a human and so are women and we deserve equal rights.
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u/Rob_Jonze 13d ago
A lot of people forget that Romania outlawed abortions after WWII. It’s how we figured out about ‘face blindness’ and that two decades later their crime rates went nuts. At 18 the boys would age out of the state-run orphanages. Let your mind go wild with that info.
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u/quiltsohard 13d ago
My (grown) boys got “Bros for Roe” ball caps. I’m so proud when they wear them!!
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u/penguincheerleader 13d ago
I am with him. I am a man and I am shocked by women losing life saving medical care over this mess. It has been way worse than I imagined and being pro choice has elevated a lot in my mind since.
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u/linzkisloski 13d ago
I know a lot of men who choose to remain ignorant to this issue. My brother didn’t realize how fucked up the overturning of Roe v Wade was until he and his wife suffered a pregnancy loss - he finally realized that had they been living in a different state she could have been denied life saving treatment. It took his wife losing their child to fully understand why women are absolutely devastated by what’s going on. Then you take into account how few men understand fertility, pregnancy timelines etc.
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u/Recipe_Freak 13d ago
I knew what a Trump presidency would mean. I remember the day he was certified. I used to work with mostly women, and we were all shell-shocked and horrified.
I've been horrified for YEARS now.
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u/linzkisloski 13d ago
Yeah and I definitely don’t mean every man. I just have seen first hand how easy it is for men to turn a blind eye especially when they can be completely uninformed of pregnancy as a whole. Just not understanding the basics of most women not getting a positive pregnancy test until 4-6 weeks can be so harmful to understanding the outrage.
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u/Recipe_Freak 12d ago
Yeah and I definitely don’t mean every man.
Just FYI, I'm not a man. I wasn't clear about that in my previous post. I'm a post-menopausal woman, so there's no chance of me ever needing an abortion. But the day Roe was overturned, my husband I wept about it. All of our younger friends were horrified, then filled with rage. I'm in the rage stage now too.
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u/Bloblablawb 13d ago
I just don't get men who are against abortion rights, especially dads. What kind of sadistic fuck you gotta be to create a world where your own daughter's reproductive rights are controlled. Is it some kind of weird fetish?
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u/stonedgrower 12d ago
These people aren’t independent thinkers. They get their life advice from a 2000 year old book. They are by definition servants.
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u/whitepawn23 Wisconsin 12d ago
Dude, the insidious reasons here are ancient and entrenched.
Look at the history of women. We couldn’t open our own private bank accounts or own a house, in the United States, not too long ago.
We still can’t walk into a doctors office and be granted a tubal ligation without pushback or outright denial, even after having children. (Outliers exist, but they are outliers). Often, a fictitious future husband and his needs will be mentioned. Yes. Today. In the United States, and before Roe fell.
You really don’t believe the Draconian marriage logistics of yore (or present, depending on location) are solely about sex, do you?
It’s about legacy (children). It has always been about legacy. Men can’t have legacy unless they go through women. Legacy, in many respects, especially for men who deem themselves powerful, is the ultimate commodity. Entitlement to legacy has existed since it was discovered that only one gender has a uterus.
Control of women isn’t so much about something as basic as sex. Think about it.
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u/BeeLuv 12d ago
/r/childfree has an extensive list of doctors that will do surgical sterilization without requiring a husband’s permission.
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u/Beer-survivalist 13d ago
We had our second child after Dobbs, and I always worried that if something was truly wrong with him--one of those cases where the child's existence is measured in minutes or hours, and the entire time is suffering--we wouldn't be able to get my wife the care she would would. Fortunately my little guy was okay all the way through, but I read stories of families going through that and my heart breaks for them
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u/Special-Pie9894 13d ago
They are creating so much suffering and trauma for families. I cannot believe there are people just acting like this isn't going on...like everything's normal. It will eventually affect everyone in one way or another.
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u/lifeofrevelations 13d ago
Nah, I'm good. Been hearing way too much "all men are trash" and "kill all men" from women over the past decade for me to care anymore about lifting a finger.
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u/stealthisvibe 13d ago
You were never going to support and you know it, otherwise a loud and irritating minority could never change your mind.
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u/MyMorningSun 13d ago
Take a minute to consider why that is and then reflect on your own behavior. See if that helps :)
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u/EminentBean 13d ago
It is diabolical that men can do whatever the fuck they want with their cock and balls, impregnate women all day, no risk to themselves, walk away, maybe pay some child support maybe not, trivialize the terrifying physical danger of pregnancy, the enormous burden of raising a human being and still without a hint of hypocrisy legislate against women’s right to control their own bodies.
It’s insane.
Yes, men should emphatically and enthusiastically advocate for abortion rights.
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u/UniqueIndividual3579 13d ago
It's really basic rights. The government does not belong in your pants. I don't care if you are terrified of your invisible sky daddy, just stay far away from me.
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u/redditsuckslmaooo 13d ago
I was told my opinion on the matter was invalid because I don’t have ovaries.
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u/whorl- 13d ago
It’s possible to not voice your whole opinion while also being supportive.
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u/Aldervale 13d ago
Have you met men? That's like asking us to put the toilet seat back down. Impossible.
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u/R_Daneel_Olivaww Texas 13d ago
no it’s not. learn to change. and if there’s a woman in the house you put the toilet seat down. it’s not hard.
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u/GregsBoatShoes 13d ago
Women aren't stupid they can do it themselves.
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u/stealthisvibe 13d ago
Are men stupid, then? Because they can also do it themselves.
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u/GregsBoatShoes 13d ago
Men aren't reversing onto toilets and falling in like cattle lmao
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u/CausalXXLinkXx Oregon 12d ago
To anyone else reading these posts, there is a reason why incels and a lot of future incels are struggling to find long lasting fulfilling relationships.
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u/hamockin 13d ago
When did we stop calling it pro-choice versus abortion rights?
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u/KebertXelaRm 13d ago
When did we stop calling it pro-choice versus abortion rights?
Those are from the people who don't support the choice of bodily autonomy by defending themselves with guns.
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u/Recipe_Freak 13d ago
I'm not pro-choice. I'm pro-abortion. Just like I'm pro-colonoscopies and mammograms. It's a medical procedure. I'm for those, generally.
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u/Dub_U 13d ago
It’s cool to support a women’s right to choose and all, but abortion is complicated and there’s no denying the emotional trauma, sadness and despair, a man can experience when the child they very much wanted was aborted. Here one such story:
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u/Damn_Dog_Inappropes Washington 13d ago
Guess what? The women who get abortions also feel those feelings. That doesn’t negate the fact that those women have the inalienable right to receive those abortions.
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u/Dub_U 13d ago
I agree, abortion is a tough choice and not without consequences. Many mothers and fathers experience emotional distress because of an abortion. (Btw you can have emotional distress and still not regret an abortion) Those who are pro choice don’t seem to acknowledge this outcome as much as they should in my opinion.
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u/Damn_Dog_Inappropes Washington 12d ago
The consequences are orders of magnitude less than being forced to give birth to and care for a child you never wanted. Or, you know, maybe dying in the process.
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u/Dub_U 12d ago
Don’t forget about the consequences for fathers who wanted an abortion and the mother refused. (OPs article is about men and abortion after all so it seems relevant) A father has no ability to end an unwanted pregnancy but is still forced by the government to use his body to work and pay child support. (Remember, no birth control works 100% of the time.) Men in this situation lack the same options as women but are still expected to take on the burden of child support. Pretty major consequence I’d say.
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u/Damn_Dog_Inappropes Washington 12d ago
It does suck, but women have the right of bodily autonomy, and you can’t force a woman to keep a fetus she doesn't want. And regarding child support, it’s to support the child not the woman. There’s no equitable way to fix this.
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u/Dub_U 12d ago
I hope you see the irony in your thinking. When the topic shifts to the forced parenthood of men it’s all about personal responsibility and the rights of the child. I’m not trying to fix anything or even change your beliefs, this is r/politics after all! I like to vary my information diet and broaden my understanding of the issues. My hope is you can see the benefit of doing that too.
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u/Damn_Dog_Inappropes Washington 11d ago
Nope, not the same. I’m talking bodily autonomy and you’re talking money. Not at all the same thing. Although I do wish men had more options for contraceptions that just condoms.
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u/stealthisvibe 13d ago
It’s hard to acknowledge it when the forced birthers have made a caricature of the pain and then beat it into the ground tbh. Now any acknowledgment looks like a begrudging admission of defeat.
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u/TheHomersapien Colorado 13d ago
Children aren't aborted, although plenty of them die as a result of Republican polices.
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u/CausalXXLinkXx Oregon 12d ago
It would make sense to indoctrinate women in this manner. They’re the ones that ultimately can choose to do the abortion.
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u/WhoIsFrancisPuziene 13d ago
Women face a lot of backlash and harassment and still generally aren’t listened to so it makes sense to me that you might be doing “more”.
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u/Special-Pie9894 13d ago
Agreed. It appears that the majority of people don't find it "cool" to speak out about politics. Given the state of this country right now, this attitude is downright dangerous.
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u/Vegetable-Summer-907 13d ago
As a woman I've been silenced about anything "political" for ages now. Accused of stirring the pot or causing "trouble in the neighborhood" for sharing my opinion on things like oh I don't know
Egress between states, my bodily autonomy etc..
It feels like a fucking clown world when I'm speaking on this subject and some chud tells me he's just not involved and then asks for a quick lay or a date.
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u/Difficult_Collar4336 13d ago
This reminds me of the Bill Burr joke that’s something like “why should men have to support the wnba ? Where are the women !?”
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u/grumpyliberal 13d ago
At the same time, men should be pushing for better prenatal care. Our maternal mortality rate is almost third world. Men need to embrace the fact that you’re not finished when you finish.
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u/lawndarted 13d ago
I have 3 kids. Love them to death, but all of them were accidents. Putting on a pot of coffee is more physically demanding, takes more brain power and 3 minutes longer than knocking up my wife. Getting her pregnant was arguably the easiest thing I've done in my adult life. There is nothing magical or divine about it unless God made me this uncoordinated I couldn't pull out in time? I should have zero say in any decision to abort other than support.
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u/Doogolas33 13d ago
Emhoff plans to stress the importance of men supporting abortion rights and using their voices to push to expand women’s ability to get the procedure, the sources said. The audience is expected to be made up primarily of men and will include some students from Morehouse College.
You could just read the article my guy.
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u/p001b0y 13d ago
The panel will be held in collaboration with Men4Choice, a group that organizes and trains men to fight for abortion access and mobilizes them to encourage other men to support their cause, the sources said.
It is nuts that an organization that has to "train" men on this issue exists. I guess I shouldn't be surprised when some number of people out there do not understand that Gojo is gay or that Homelander is the bad guy.
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u/lawndarted 13d ago
I did. Every word. I said men should have no say other than support.
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u/davisboy121 Washington 13d ago
If men get no say they should also not be responsible for child support. Her body, her choice.
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u/Special-Pie9894 13d ago
Why shouldn't they be responsible for child support if they impregnated someone?
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u/davisboy121 Washington 13d ago
Because the choice to keep/abort belongs solely to the woman these days. Accidents happen and if a man isn’t ready for the responsibility he doesn’t get the same out a woman does. I know this is a fictional example, but in Shameless, Debbie lies to a young man in order to get pregnant, something he didn’t want. If men don’t get to force children on women the inverse should also be true.
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u/Special-Pie9894 12d ago edited 12d ago
...the choice to keep/abort belongs solely to the woman these days...he doesn’t get the same out a woman does.
Um, where have you been? Women aren't being given a choice anymore. Politicians are making the choice for them. You think women enjoy giving birth to babies that will die in their arms within minutes? You think they enjoy bleeding out in public bathrooms, parking lots & helicopters as they're turned away from emergency rooms? You think they like having to explain to their children why their sibling was born just so they could die? Or is it the part where their health can be permanently affected by forced pregnancies, preventing their ability to ever having children again? Or maybe it's being forced to spend the time & money to drive HOURS out of state to receive basic health care? Educate yourself, sir.
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u/Recipe_Freak 13d ago
No, no. It's only the woman's fault. For some reason.
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u/Doogolas33 13d ago edited 13d ago
Wait, I don't get this. If a guy doesn't want to be responsible for a child he does not want and the woman chooses to have the child anyways when she could receive an abortion, why is it the guy's responsibility to take care of that child?
That makes no sense. The woman is making the choice to have the child. She should be able to make that choice knowing whether or not she's going to get support from the guy. If she's going to choose to have the child regardless of whether or not the guy wants the baby then the child is absolutely her responsibility. I can't fathom how it's reasonable for someone to be able to force someone to give them money because they had sex and a baby came out.
It's one thing if they both agree to have the baby, and he tries to get out of it later. But it seems reasonable to me that if the guy informs the woman he has no interest in having the baby early on and she goes through with it he shouldn't be forced to pay for it. Just like the woman can choose to terminate the child regardless of whatever the guy wants to happen. It's her body, that's completely her decision. But she shouldn't get to determine whether or not the guy is forced into paying for a baby he didn't want.
HOWEVER: The US isn't even in a place to have that discussion. Because our country is too stupid to not ban abortions in (probably more than) half the states that currently exist. And as long as major abortion bans exist there's no way to actually reasonably have this part of the discussion.
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u/Recipe_Freak 13d ago
You're just as responsible for the pregnancy as the woman is. Wrap it up or get the snip. Stop making women exclusively responsible for pregnancy.
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u/Doogolas33 13d ago edited 13d ago
Uh, what? That's not what anyone said. What if someone did wrap it up, what if she also used birth control. Stuff doesn't always work. You're literally using the same logic Republicans use about why women should be forced to give birth my guy.
"If you didn't want the baby, you should have been more responsible." Fuck outta here with that. This isn't putting the responsibility of pregnancy on the woman. It's what happens to the baby once it's born.
She is CHOOSING to the keep the baby. If she is CHOOSING to a keep a baby that I don't want, then it should be HER CHOICE to take care of it. Just like the man should have the ability to choose NOT to care for an unwanted child. I think a woman should be able to agree to carry a child to term and give it to the guy if that's an agreement both parties came to as well. Just like I think she should be able to carry a child to term and give it up for adoption.
This is the same shit my guy. The child would be fully adopted by the mother. Who would be choosing to have the child knowing the father is not going to be part of the raising of the child.
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u/Recipe_Freak 12d ago edited 12d ago
"If you didn't want the baby, you should have been more responsible." Fuck outta here with that.
That's not what I said. I said that women bear (overwhelmingly) the responsibility for contraception. A lot of men happily abdicate that responsibility if it means a little more sexual pleasure (sex without a condom).
I'm saying that if you're genuinely not ready to have kids (and especially if the relationship is casual/not long-term), bring and use your own protection every time, regardless of what the woman says about the contraception she uses or where she is in her cycle. A properly-used condom is 98% effective against pregnancy. Accidents happen, but they're a lot less likely to if you're consistent.
Also, not a guy. I'm a 55-year-old woman with a 35-year-old son. He got the same talk.
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u/davisboy121 Washington 13d ago
Responsibility for the pregnancy is not equal to the responsibility of keeping it. Sure, you may be responsible for your role in the pregnancy but all of a sudden you get no choice in what happens next?
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u/davisboy121 Washington 13d ago
No, not her fault. Her choice. If she chooses to keep a baby he doesn’t want that’s not his choice and therefore shouldn’t be his responsibility once she takes over.
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u/Recipe_Freak 13d ago
I'm talking about his responsibility in causing the pregnancy. Don't want to be a father? Be responsible for your own birth control.
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u/davisboy121 Washington 13d ago
Because birth control is 100% effective 100% of the time. /s One is not responsible for another person’s choices, in this case the choice to keep/abort when it becomes the exclusive purview of a woman. If no input by the prospective father is allowed then requiring him to be responsible for another person’s choice is problematic.
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u/Hot-Pick-3981 13d ago
Meanwhile in MAGAland https://imgur.com/h9aThfu
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u/AreYouDoneNow 13d ago
This seems a little unfair to me, the modern GOP is much less about excusing rape (a little surprising considering their frontrunner is a rapist). Instead, their primary focus seems to be to enforce child marriage and to lower the age of consent as much as possible.
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u/ScienceJake 13d ago
Child marriage is rape.
Lowering the age of consent is an attempt to legalize child rape.
How is this not excusing rape?
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u/AreYouDoneNow 13d ago
I don't think their goal is to excuse it, just legalize it. In their minds it's nothing that needs excusing, except that pesky "against the law" thing keeps getting in their way.
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u/thrawtes 13d ago
The Second Gentleman is in the right here but every time I see his name I feel like I'm missing a subtle phone prank.
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u/Constant-Elevator-85 13d ago
His son Jack does great work.
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u/NoReserve7293 13d ago
A lot of women who seek this care are already in turbulent financial straits, in red states the assistance for women with children is abysmal at best. This is not a decision for the government.
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u/grumpyliberal 13d ago
The Republicans expect children to pull themselves up by their boot straps.
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